Kevin Spencer

Percy is let out of prison and joins a militia group the same crew that the Spencer's uppity neighbors, the Bensons, have hired to kill them. On their way to the liquor store to make the hit on Anastasia, Percy manages to rat out the militia group and save his wife.

Kevin ditches school to play pool at the Camel Toe, where he meets Victor the pool shark. Victor takes Kevin under his wing to teach him how to hustle. Kevin trains hard but ends up facing Fat Tony, a notorious hustler himself. Percy spends the episode in prison with Eustace the cannibal, while Mom takes advantage of Percy's absence to have sex with some of the neighborhood men.

The foreman at the construction site across the street offers Percy $300 to fight in the illegal fights he organizes down at the docks. Percy agrees, and ends up losing badly to the undefeated Gary ""Grim Reaper"" Morgan. The Bensons, in an effort to get back at the Spencer's for Kevin's antics, have an insurance adjuster videotape Percy's fight so that his workman's comp gets cut off.

The Spencer's visit the mall where Mom meets her favorite soap hunk, Brock Brickleydale who she ends up stocking and almost killing. Percy shoplifts Kevin a pet snake, but Kevin winds up arrested for the crime after his parents ditch him. A corrupt old cop arranges for Kevin to become a trainer for a guide dog, which Kevin trains to be a canine-version of himself.

When Charlie Plunt's student loan money comes in, he takes Mom and Kevin to Niagara Falls after ratting out Percy to the cops. Kevin is bored and explores the town on his own. He manages to hook up with Percy who jumped bail so the pair go on an insane bender that ends in a police chase over the falls.

It's the first day of summer holidays and Kevin is bored so he joins a religious group. The group plans an outing to shoot doctors at the abortion clinic where Anastasia happens to be taking advantage of the clinic's ""buy-six-get-one-free"" offer. The religious cult's plans are foiled when Percy gets thrown off his motorcycle during a police chase and lands on the maniacal firing squad.

The hospital where Percy is being treated for a heart attack is taken over by terrorists. Kevin hides out with a bad ass nurse he's fallen in love with while Percy gets stuck in an elevator. Mom makes the best of the situation and tries to sleep with as many doctors as possible. Horny mom saves the day when she makes a move on the terrorists who flee the building in fear.

Kevin and Percy steel an old car from the delusional Widow Coulson, the same woman Kevin is forced to deliver her meals on wheels. Kevin grows to like the old hag because she was as insane as he was, and because she had lots of medication.

Kevin discovers a hidden knack for computers and joins a hackers club. Dr. Franklin, Kevin's psychiatrist figures he has misdiagnosed Kevin: instead of a sociopath Kevin is, in fact a misguided genius! Kevin re-routes the city's 911 calls to Percy who discovers a hidden talent of his own ""fighting"" crime as the super hero ""Drunken Welfare Man.

Kevin wanders away from his classmates while on a field trip to the over-commercial ""Pioneer Village"" and winds up getting a history lesson from a one-hundred-and- seventeen-year-old drunk.

While on a tour of the porn studios, Kevin witnesses the split of partners Pornman and Afroman. Kevin becomes Pornman's agent in the actor's pursuit of more artistic endeavors and lands him various gigs, including a role in the Catholic Association of Teachers and Anal Retentives for Acting's performance of ""Hair.""

It's New Year's Day and Kevin overdoses like an amateur on booze left behind at the scene of a car accident. Allan is disgusted with him and decides to trying living in other people's heads for a while, including the Widow Coulson's. Percy, meanwhile, recruits Kevin to help him steel Charlie's trailer full of weed.

Instead of prosecuting Percy for shoplifting, Jimmy the pawnshop owner has Kevin work in the shop. Kevin endures Jimmy's recounting of life story and learns that Jimmy has a long, lost sister whom Kevin later finds banging Percy in their garden shed. In an effort to end the liquor store workers' strike, Percy gets hired to make threatening phone calls to strikers.

After a booze-up with dad is accidentally videotaped at the Music Station's video-talk-back-booth, Percy gets arrested on live television and Kevin reaches celebrity status. Kevin gets an agent and shares the fame with Anastasia. The courts sentence Percy to have a lobotomy after a botched prison escape.

Kevin runs away and becomes a roadie for a rock band after impressing them with his alcoholism. Anastasia's plea to the media to help her find Kevin lands her some sweet stand up gigs including an appearance on the Mike Bullard Show on the same evening Kevin plans his revenge on the band.

While grave robbing one evening, Kevin and Percy fall into an abandoned, underground government testing facility where they encounter blood-thirsty zombies attempting to sway them to the Dark Side. Kevin and Percy team up with Vern Charlebois, an adventurous moose-hunter worthy of action hero status.

Kevin slips in and out of television-inspired dreams during a night of drinking and channel surfing. His surreal adventures mimic programming styles from a ""Leave-it-to-Beaver"" style sitcom to evangelical programming to porn.

Kevin wins a Cruise and spends his days and nights in the ship's casino playing poker with a loud-mouthed Texan named Big Earl as well as some familiar faces. When a storm hits, Kevin is shipwrecked. He decides to lay down and die since starting a fire and looking for food is too much like work. He is miraculously nursed back-to-health and sobriety by a kind and loving island man.