Turbo Dates

A woman on a date meets a guy who has a woman literally climbing on his back the entire time. He explains that it is his ex-girlfriend who is having a little bit of trouble letting go of the relationship. The woman tries to help them out, but it turns out her date is having trouble letting go as well.

A date starts off seemingly well, but a woman has a question for her date. She wants to know if her date would be willing to give her what she desires in the bedroom, and while sometimes it is hard to ask for what you want, especially in bed, it's even harder if there are dozens of different ways to ask for it.

A handsome guy presents a glass ring that is supposed to work like a glass slipper, and magically reveal to him his true love. The woman doesn't buy the idea, because his ring would fit a million different women, but she tries it on anyway, and it gets stuck. He gets down on one knee to propose, and maybe the whole encounter is fake, but who is scamming whom?

On this date, rival assassins from feuding ancient Chinese clans meet by chance. The date turns into as disaster, and they attempt to assassinate each other. Amongst the conflict and fighting, they find that being adversaries and enemies is a turn on, and admit that the life of an assassin is quite lonely.

Two people sit down and speak exactly the same words at exactly the same time, which is charming at first, then progressively strange. They discover they love the exact same things, have the exact same dreams, but also the exact same flaws, all while speaking the exact same words. Can romance survive perfect compatibility?

A on a date guy declares he will never ever compromise. He will forever search for the perfect woman, the woman he is truly supposed to be with. Just like the "Woman in the White Dress" from Citizen Kane. But what if the perfect woman is sitting right in front of you, and you are too blind to see it?

A woman on a date starts off the date violently because she believes that men and women are adversaries, romance is a war, so why not just get that out up front, and start off an encounter with a good hard slap to the face. Maybe opposites attract, and getting into a fight is a turn-on, unless maybe it's not.

A woman on a date meets with an elderly bald man who presents himself as young and handsome with a full head of hair. She figures out that he has confused his fake online persona used to attract younger women with his actual self and decides to go along with it, after all, you're as young as you feel, right?

A woman on a date sits down opposite a young boy, far too young to date, and he explains that his dad is a complete failure at choosing women, so his father is going to let him make the next pick. The boy has a series of hard hitting questions for potential dates, culminating with X-Box vs. PlayStation 3?

A guy brings measuring tape on a date, checking the woman's waist, bust, distance between the eyes, height, arm length. He explains that he has determined the stats of the genetically perfect woman, he will not date a woman who deviates too far from the ideal. But doesn't that mean he has to measure up as well?

A man starts off his date by asking a woman for her "number." She assumes he means phone number, but he is talking about Google hits, and asks her if she is "google-able." He seems to care about status and power and wants to date women who have some sort of fame, and calls it the modern equivalent of prestige.

A jaded woman on a date explains that she has given up on her long-lived search for "Prince Charming," and just wants a guy who can do simple things, like remembering to take out the trash, because she believes that inside every single Prince Charming type, is just the beating heart of a toad, and it takes only a few months until his charm wears off.

An anxious woman only three minutes shy of her 35th birthday is fearful of becoming a Puma, which is the 35-year-old version of a Cougar, and knows that when she becomes a puma everything will change. She believes that once she is a puma, she will follow the path of a character in Sleepless in Seattle, where she will probably not find a husband and lose all interest in romance.

This date starts off with two people who already were married. A guy hates his ex-wife so much that he invents a time machine to travel from the future to come back in time and stop his past self from ever meeting the woman who is destined to become his wife. Will he be able to stop this failed marriage from happening?

A guy has lots of ex-wives and failed marriages. He also has lots of kids and shows his date pictures of them all. Including all the kids he had out-of-wedlock. And even his adopted kids. On the date, he gets a call from the adoption agency with more kids on the way. What does he do for a living? He's "Sperm donor."