Two and a Half Men

Charlie Harper is a well-to-do bachelor. His casual Malibu lifestyle was interrupted when his tightly wound brother, Alan, and Alan's young son, Jake, came to stay with him.

At Charlie's urging, Alan decides to put his past behind him and returns a ceramic giraffe he vindictively took from Judith during the divorce.

Jake thinks he's dreaming late one night when he sees the teacher who tried to get him suspended, Miss Pasternak, practically naked in Charlie's kitchen.

Jake adores Judith's rich, new boyfriend because the man has a boat and a pool, and he promises to teach Jake how to snorkel and scuba dive.

Charlie dates a woman, Sherri, who is a self-centered, manipulative narcissist--a female Charlie. But Charlie doesn't like the way Sherri treats him.

When Evelyn tells Jake that Alan shoplifted a toy as a child, Alan denies the charge, as he has ever since the incident took place.

In order to serve as a good example to Jake, who has been disrespectful lately to his mother, Charlie and Alan begrudgingly agree to give their own mother a party.

Alan's expectations for a first date with Nancy, a woman he met while shopping for groceries, are far exceeded when she introduces him to a world of sex he never knew existed.

Charlie encounters Lisa, the woman he thought was "the one" until she informed him of her engagement another man. He's thrilled to learn that her marriage did not work out.

Charlie writes the theme song for a new cartoon, but Jake hates the song. Realizing that Jake knows the comic better than he does, Charlie enlists his nephew's help.

Charlie is surprised when a woman, Gail, with whom he flirts in a bar, rejects his overtures and tells him that women around town have been comparing notes on his philandering.

Jamie, Alan's close high school friend, visits Alan at the house. Charlie used to make fun of Jamie when they were teenagers and they both vie for her affections.

When an earthquake causes plumbing damage in Judith's home, Alan allows her to move into the beach house temporarily--much to Charlie's displeasure.

After Evelyn undermines Jake's confidence by belittling his hard-earned high grade on a test, Alan decides to cut her out of their lives.

On a boring, rainy weekend, Charlie convinces Alan to ride with Jake and him to Las Vegas. Apprehensive about his upcoming colonoscopy, Alan agrees that the diversion will be good for him.

Judith takes a vacation and leaves Jake with Alan. But then Alan finds out he's being audited by the Internal Revenue Service.

While in a precarious position with a woman, Charlie injures his back and won't let Alan--a chiropractor--help him.

Charlie masquerades as a homosexual so that Eric will continue to give Charlie more jingles. Charlie convinces Alan to pretend to be his gay partner and attend a party hosted by Eric.

While at a coffee shop, Alan and Charlie encounter Sherri, a woman who once dated Charlie just so she could have sex with him. Alan is enchanted with her beauty.

Evelyn harasses Charlie and Judith bills Alan for an expensive pair of tennis shoes. Unable to express the anger they have towards the women, Charlie and Alan lash out at each other.

While scanning the obituaries for potential property listings, Evelyn discovers that her second husband, Harry, has died.

After Evelyn gives Alan a loan so he can purchase a new Porsche, Charlie informs his brother that Alan has sold his soul to the devil. Evelyn proves Charlie is right.

When Evelyn learns that Jake spent his entire spring vacation with his other grandparents, she pressures Alan into letting Jake stay with her for a night.

Charlie has sex with a gorgeous young woman, Natalie. At school, Jake is required to give a report to his fifth-grade class about his weekend.